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The following 2 comments and questions have been sent in. They are listed according to date.
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Enemy is spreading rumours
Question
August 23, 2005
Hi umm i was wondering if i could get sum advice at the moment life sucks all because of my enemys my reputation is ruined all my ex mates think im gay so they dont want to be my mate anymore all because my enemy spreaded a rumour everytime i see him he always wants to fight me but i dont want to and i jus walk away im trying to get on with life but its hard with no mates that will back you up ive got my family they are trying to help but there never there when i need them i really need help ive been isolated at home and cant go out but my enemy is sort of on the 'street life' so i always see him walking the streets.its screwing up my grades for school to cause i never want 2 go plz help
Thanks Martin
Martin - New Zealand
7861
Answer
One thing you don't want to have are enemies. They can screw up your life, and it isn't worth the hassle. Unfortunately, there are people who will dislike you because of jealously, competition, something you did, or some misunderstanding.
The first thing to do is not to consider this guy as your enemy. You don't want to do him harm, and you don't want to have anything to do with him. Calling him your enemy makes him just that. Instead, just say he is just another guy.
Now figure out why he considers you his enemy. It sounds like he wants revenge for something you did to him. Hopefully, it was just a misunderstanding that you could correct.
But some people don't want to give up. They want to get revenge, to fight, or to ruin their enemies.
Remember that it is always good to know your enemies. You can keep an eye on them. It is your so-called friends that can stab you in the back.
What type of mates are those that will drop you, because some bully is spreading rumors about you? Even if you were afraid to fight him, what is wrong with them? Are they afraid of him too? Maybe that is why they don't back you up. Call them out on this. You have nothing to lose. Let them know you are disappointed with them for not supporting you.
It is a tough situation. You can keep a low profile and hope he will get tired of harrassing you. You can look for new friends in school. If he doesn't stop, perhaps you will need to confront him and try to kick his butt. If he doesn't go to school, you might check with the police about his harrassment.
Like I said, it is a tough situation. Probably keeping a low profile for a while will work the best. But also calling out your ex-mates is worthwhile.
I hope these ideas help. Let me know how things turn out.
Spreading rumors
Question
June 25, 2005
What is the legal term for spreading rumors to damage ones reputation??
Charlie - USA
7364
Answer
It is legally called slander or defamation of character.
Slander is considered a tort or civil wrong, and the injured person can bring a lawsuit against the person who made the false statement.
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